You think you know a person and start relying on him or her. You expect things to be done or said, and assume they will know when and how to fulfill what you hope for. But before you know it, life happens and disappointment hits you like cupid, except it breaks your heart.
Does this sound familiar? I have been there more times than I care to admit! The problem is not necessarily that they are “bad” people who choose to betray your trust. The issue is often that they are human! Yes, they are not perfect, as neither are we. But what do we do when we get our feelings hurt?
Of course it depends what kind of wrong has been done to us. There are things that truly cannot be easily “brushed under the rug.” There are times we must truly move on from relationships that are just too unhealthy for us. But before you quickly become offended and choose to withdraw (with reason or not), I invite you to consider how sometimes sin overpower us.
You may say, but, I would have never done this to this person! Or, I have done so much good for him/her. Perhaps, you are always saying yes and available. The thing is, even though we don’t deserve what has been done (or not done) to us, we clearly have faults. They may be very different and not measure up in our eyes, but a wrong still a wrong.
Sometimes these people that make us so upset may truly not know any better… In fact, they may not even realize how they have failed us! So, again, analyze whether the fault is something that can be overlooked. If it is, focus on the positive aspects of the relationship and find a way to express how certain things are affecting you. That’s how relationships grow.
While it’s imperative to not feel guilty or responsible for whatever happened that broke our trust or hurt our feelings, it is equally important to accept that we are not entitled to as much as we’d like. Inclusive, sometimes we may indeed be part of the problem. For instance, we may have unrealistic expectations. However, certain offenses are undeniably wrong and have no possible “good” or innocent explanation. This is when our trust in the Lord must be even stronger.
If we choose to forgive, we must truly forgive! Otherwise we will be too self-consumed—which is also a sin, and not be able to restore the relationship. We will continue to hurt and live in a vicious cycle. Depending on the offense, this process may take years. But it can truly happen if we honestly choose to forgive (yes, it is a choice). Choose to accept that the offender is truly sorry. In fact, it is beneficial and freeing to forgive even when there is no apology. You will not know for certain if they will commit the same offense against you or not, but in order to move forward, you must choose to believe their intentions are genuinely good and be confident that you gave it all your best.
If you feel the offense is too big, and perhaps the relationship cannot be repaired. I’m with you too. I have been on both sides, I have been able to restore relationships and I have had to move on. In either case, our hearts truly get broken, sometimes little by little. Other times all at once! I want you to remember that we shouldn’t trust people, not because they are not worthy of it, but because they are inevitably sinners like you and me. And they WILL let you down.
There is nothing that can explain where and why our trust should be better than Psalm 146:
Praise the Lord.
Praise the Lord, my soul.
I will praise the Lord all my life;
I will sing praise to my God as long as I live.
Do not put your trust in princes,
in human beings, who cannot save.
When their spirit departs, they return to the ground;
on that very day their plans come to nothing.
Blessed are those whose help is the God of Jacob,
whose hope is in the Lord their God.
He is the Maker of heaven and earth,
the sea and everything in them
—he remains faithful forever.
He upholds the cause of the oppressed
and gives food to the hungry.
The Lord sets prisoners free,
the Lord gives sight to the blind,
the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down,
the Lord loves the righteous.
The Lord watches over the foreigner
and sustains the fatherless and the widow,
but he frustrates the ways of the wicked.
The Lord reigns forever,
your God, O Zion, for all generations.
Praise the Lord.
Especially Psalm 146:3 “Do not put your trust in princes, in human beings, who cannot save.”
No matter how good a person may be, we only have one Lord and Savior. No one can provide the satisfaction and blessings that fully trusting in God provides. And is not their fault, it’s just the nature of human kind ever since Adam & Eve disobeyed God.
So, please know there is only one judge. There is only one person who will never fail us or leave us behind. Don’t let mere humans destroy the beauty of life. Put your trust and hope in the Lord. He will take care of you, He will protect you and repair your heart.
All you need to do is pray for wisdom, seek His help, ask Him to guide your path.
Psalm 146 is packed of amazing wisdom, I will explore more with you later, but I hope this helps you remember that when we trust in the Lord, we believe everything has a mighty purpose that only He knows. Our job is to fulfill His will by constantly seeking more of Him.
You may wonder, but what about what they did to me?! Is not fair… Part of trusting in the Lord is being at peace with our offenders. Knowing that it is HIS job to work on others, not ours to seek revenge or “fix” people. Two wrongs don’t make one right and we don’t have magic powers. All we can do is pray for them. Pray that they will realize their wrongdoings and for God to guide their path.
May God Bless You with Love, Peace and Wisdom Today!